Kingdragon's Rant of Randomness

Okay...I don't even know if I'll actually ever post this one but just felt like I had to get this somewhere and doesn't matter if its read or not just didn't want to forget it. So I never knew I'd be able to care about anyone let alone anything anymore enough to get angry, sad and even end up crying over 'em, but I did. I did all those stuff. By now y'all will think this is some kind of confession for love or something... but its not. I mean its doesn't really have to be. But, I was able to care about somebody who I had no known relation with, took a long while to get there, but when we did boy was it wonderful. So, despite all the random depressions and misunderstandings and that late....like overly due ...patch up? ....it was great. Probably won't forget you or y'all even though I'd put my money on me being forgotten 'cause ....well y'all memory sucks. And I most probably even had some kinda feelings that went unannounced  but gues...

Well....was no.13 ...been a long time coming ....and I still have no idea how to word it properly but here we go..... So.... I've always thought everyone around me kinda know what they want me to be doing. What they fell like I should do ...in general. No, none of them ever ask me what I'd wanna do... they just know apparently. And me, being the that kind of idiot ends up doing as I'm told because what do I know about what I wanna do? ...you know expect of all those things that I know I wanna do... what do I even know about myself? Just been living with myself for most part of my life...nothing much. I know it sounds like I'm bitching and whining but ... read the title for this blog again.... Now, I'm not saying their reasoning was wrong or anything....they probably thought of something too....probably (yeah....I sugarcoat stuff too.... Beepish-1  Random Citizen-0) but I don't really have to agree with your reasoning ...I just do because....well....brainwashed?...

I don't really remember if I actually posted about this before bit, but I do remember going on this long ass rant about how a lot of these spoilt ass adults and people need to be ruled by a dictator. Like its kinda obvious some are never gonna get it through their thick skulls how something is really necessary for something good because it would mean splitting from what they have been and are comfortable doing. I mean king Mahendra was kinda justified in that sense as he didn't see things improving while things went as it was going and thus did what he did and you know... You could read most of what happened next in the history books. Although depending on when those books were written they gone be biased towards one of the parties but I mean the outrage that happened against him happened because people didn't like that they weren't getting profited.

Now if you are here after that weird post that was posted on that one thing (Remaining anonymous:101) well IDK yet. But if you're here without a clue... Well you're in the right place... Kinda... Were you looking for a place to read someone whining and complaining. So ..let the third person monologue begin... No it wasn't him, you know it. I know you know it wasn't him yet still you choose to torment him for something that he never did. What you wanna pick on someone who wouldn't say anything just so that you could relieve all your frustration on? He said he just wanted one thing from you, that you don't ignore him. He didn't ask for time or even love, and I know how much he needs that right now, especially from you. But he didn't ask for any of that. He just asked that you don't ignore him. Yet you say you're not even sure if you can do that. Aren't you the one who told him that you love him? What your love faded? Yeah I understand you we...

Maybe it was obvious from all these post but to come straight to the point I'm mostly just depressed and sad and lonely. Even when surrounded by people who... as a matter of fact are really close to the heart but still there's always this loneliness.. And nothing seemed to be able to do anything about that until that one person came in to my life. Well she was well that person that made the loneliness go away. Like I've never felt any loneliness when I'm with her and believe me I always feel lonely. So when I'm sad or depressed or just need that person just meet her... I try to. But sadly it seem she just ain't got the time. Yeah we talk about our future together and all those stuff...but she just seem to not have time for me and well me being pessimistically paranoid go on to go all those thought process that'd make me cry. And that's like every other day. Yup that one person who could make all that loneliness go away doesn't have time to be with m...

I don't know how exactly this works but its not suppose to like, be this annoying right? Was not what I signed on to. But it just keeps on coming back over and over and over like its got some kinda vendetta against me. I mean once was enough, you don't need to keep on reminding me of it over and over and over okay. Once was pretty much fine, twice was eye opening and thrice was pushing it but come on. Yeah I know, not exactly stating what the IT over here is, but that's not the point here. But who gives a shit. Just over and over and over again and again, I don't know how many times I have used that phrase by now.....huh. I mean I just wanna forget it all... okay, not all of it. Maybe like the majority of it. I mean I don't know... there were some pretty important stuffs in there too. But I just can't keep on pretending that I'm alright with it all, or all right at all while we're at that....because I'm not. Never gonna openly admit it ...in fact I ...